Moving

“See, I am making all things new.” Rev. 21:5

I’m moving offices and although I’ve been in my current office only three and a half years I’ve accumulated lot of files, reports, and books. Between the sorting and packing the other day I took a break to talk to a colleague about a new project. Our conversation led us to the subject of organizational change. We speculated about how a bold new initiative can generate energy and enthusiastic action, then ever so slightly fade over the years as it becomes institutionalized. It gets seen as normal, as “the way we do things here;” new ideas and energy are directed elsewhere. People are curious and as much as we like patterns and routines we also like new things and we like to be creative, creating. Both for our minds and our bodies, we have to keep moving to stay lively, limber, and flexible.

I imagined a lobster trying to grow without shedding its shell. It would be squeezed, constricted, stifled, and unable to move because of the weight of all the new shells formed over the old. While it is disruptive to pack up my office and move to another building, it also is an opportunity to shed some baggage and possessions that are old and no longer useful. If I were to drag to the new office all my old files, books, and mementos, I too would be weighed down and unable to move, unable to grow or change or to do new things. That printout of the presentation I made in 2000? It was a good presentation but now it’s out of date, and the printout doesn’t make it any more current. The national norms from the 2001 survey? They probably are on the web by now, if I ever really need to see them. It is okay to give up old things (old habits, old ideas) so that there is room in my new office (new year, new life) to think and do new things.

What is it that’s holding you down, keeping you from being able to move? Is it possessions? Things you’ve signed up for or agreed to do? Attitudes? Things you think are supposed to be so? What new things could you be doing, what new friends could you be making, if you had some freedom to move, to breathe, to stretch and grow?

It doesn’t have to be difficult, and it doesn’t have to be done all at once. I started with one file, then another. Then one drawer, and a shelf. It felt great! It was liberating to let go so that I can move on.

Which will you be – the lobster with all its old shells, weighed down by their gradual accumulation? Or the lobster with a new shell, growing and changing?

Gracious God, thank you for the example of nature, ever growing and changing. Help me to resist the temptation to stay the same. Let me follow your lead toward newness of life. Amen.

Changing plans

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.” Jeremiah 29:11-12.

How important it is to stay flexible and fluid, especially when it comes to driving in winter! My plan for this morning was to pick up my son from the bus in New York City, spend time with him, and then hit the road to Maine where I will spend Thanksgiving with my “Maine man” and his kids. As of last night the impending nor’eater was putting a crimp in those plans, with its rain projected to turn to snow, steadily precipitating throughout the day and into tonight. I was thinking that it would be smarter to stay put today and make the 400 mile drive tomorrow, still arriving on Thanksgiving day.

The phone call last night, an update from my son about a mix-up with the bus ticket, meant that I’ll be driving to Philadelphia today to pick him up. Weather forecast: rain, no snow south of here. Good news! I’ll get to spend more time with my son, and Plan B (drive to Maine tomorrow) still is in place. No worries, no upsets, and (I hope) no accidents along the way.

I am well aware, however, of the saying “When we make plans, God laughs” so I know that my plans may have to change yet again. Like trees that bend in the wind but do not break, being both flexible and steadfast today will help me to weather this storm. I will pray for safety for everyone who is traveling to spend time with loved ones, whether their travels take them on plane, train, bus, car, boat, bike, or on foot.

Lord, today I will cherish the journey and the destination, blessing the strangers along the way as well as my loved ones at the end of the road. Amen.

A direct connection

“Word of God, speak, would you pour down like rain, washing my eyes to see your majesty, to be still and know that you’re in this place . . .” – from the song “Word of God Speak” by MercyMe

[This post was written Oct. 11, 2014] It is a dark and rainy morning in New Jersey. I have an unscheduled day and am enjoying a slow morning – reading the Bible, reading Anne Lamott, listening to the rain and a bird chirping. The rain is a gift, slowing me down and canceling my plans for yard work. I can be still for a while and let the beauty of nature and the love in the words sink into my heart. I thank God that I can pray right here where I am sitting, without having to download a new version of a prayer “app”, without having to sign in to my account, and without first having to charge my phone or tablet or other device. Prayer is an opportunity to connect with God and get my batteries charged, drawing on the food and power of God’s Word and Spirit. “Give us this day our daily bread” is for me today, “Give us this day our time with You, Lord, so that we can get grounded, centered, and ready to be compassion and action in the world.”

Lord, I praise you for your creation, for your nourishing rain, and for the direct connection of prayer. Amen.

Eye-to-eye

“The eyes are the window to your soul.” – William Shakespeare

“Look me in the eye and say that!” is a taunt used in anger or indignation, urging someone seen as cowardly or inferior to repeat the challenge or insult that has been spoken. Looking someone in the eye creates a direct and personal connection; letting someone look into your eyes invites communication, even intimacy. A helpful tip for travelers at friendly border crossings is to take off their sunglasses so that the Customs agent can see the eyes of the travelers. Doing so conveys openness and engenders trust.

I had a wonderful conversation with a colleague from another college at a recent learning community retreat. She and I have known each other for a dozen years, seeing each other annually at this retreat. We usually ask about each other’s families and have a pleasant conversation. This year our conversation became deeper, sharing more of the details of our lives and our histories, our ups and downs. In the midst of a lively, noisy reception we were had a heart-to-heart conversation about our hopes and dreams. I think the turning point was our eye contact. As I started to share more about myself I became aware of feeling deeply moved, and I realized that there was a decision I could make – I could move off to talk to different people, or continue the conversation at a lighter level by changing the subject, or I could look her in the eye and risk feeling the emotions – both sadness and joy – that were attached to the things we were talking about. I looked at her and we held our eye contact, our eyes tearing up as we did so, knowing that it was an unusual moment of connection and grace. The colleague and friend I knew professionally was now a much closer friend. We had given each other the gift of ourselves and our attention, really listening to and hearing not just the words of the other but also the emotions in those words and stories. Strange that eye contact had opened up my ears, but it was more my heart that was opened, the better for my senses to work.

When is the last time you really looked into the eyes of an acquaintance, a friend, or a loved one, holding that eye contact and listening to the emotions behind the words? Try it today for a jolt of connection, a powerful and bold way to give that person a gift of love and grace, an affirmation of his or her importance and worth.

Thank you, Lord, for eyes to really see into the hearts of others, and to let them see me too. Amen.

P.S. – a shout out to Barbara S., whose words of appreciation at the retreat made a huge difference for me, and got me back online!

Inspired by humor

Driving home this evening I listened to NPR – as I often do – and was touched and inspired by this story of using humor to reach across cultural differences. A Muslim researcher from Chicago gets some humor training from a Jewish comedienne from New York City. Heartwarming and lovely, thanks to Judy Carter and Dalia Mogahed for their laughter and courage in trying new things!

Seriously (lol), listen to this now – 9 minutes of great radio.

I was sifting through the kitchen drawers, looking for the lobster crackers. You know, the shiny silver colored kind you use to crack open the hard shells of the lobster claws (or mixed nuts, if you prefer.) I looked in one drawer then another with no luck. I checked and rechecked. I knew they were there somewhere, as we had used them before. Shiny, silver, . . . nothing. So I asked my friend, in whose house we were cooking the lobsters, to look for them. He dug around in the drawers and found them. One was black and one was maroon, the plastic kind.

As I was digging it had occurred to me that I wasn’t finding them because I was looking for what I thought I would find. I wasn’t really seeing what was in the drawers, just what wasn’t. But I hadn’t stopped long enough to reframe my view. I kept on looking for what I thought I should find!

How often do we do that? How often do we see what we are looking for, instead of what’s really in front of us? When I am looking for it, I can see trouble, bad news, bad luck, or “evidence” confirming my side of the story. My pre-conceived ideas can lead me see what I want to see, or to overlook something else. And I can be so sure of what I think I know that I don’t stop to consider that my assumptions may not be accurate.

I need to be careful to set my viewing filter to a setting that is less focused on what I think I’ll find, and more on what is there. I need to be more willing to see what’s possible, instead of what I’ve already decided is there.

Lord, open my eyes to see so that I can see all the good that you have set before me. Thank you for your gracious abundance and forgiveness.

Ice cream

I love ice cream and I eat it with some regularity. The cool sweet creaminess is refreshing and delicious, and even the image of ice cream speaks to me of relaxation and enjoyment. I don’t hurry my way through ice cream, taking a long time to lick a cone, or savoring a little bit of topping with each bite of a sundae. When I was very young I made a poster with the heading “ice cream is good any way” and I illustrated it with a cone, a sandwich, and a sundae.

I’ll admit, now that I’m older each decision to eat ice cream usually comes with a bit of debate. Should I have some at this time? When was the last time I had some? What else have I eaten today? What else do I plan to eat? What else am I willing to forgo so that I can have some? How much exercise have I done? Of course all these questions are related to my weight and my body image and (in last place) my health. Have my good choices weighed out this potentially bad choice? I have it pretty firmly embedded in my thinking that I must earn my ice cream, that it is a reward for good behavior.

I’ll also admit that my relationship with God is somewhat like my relationship with ice cream. Even though the reformed Presbyterian theology is embedded firmly in the belief that all our transgressions are forgiven – that Christ died to save us from our sins, once and for all – I still fall into old ways of thinking. I catch myself thinking that I have to earn God’s grace, that I have to do enough good things to account for the times when I am selfish or competitive or uncaring.

Thankfully, I sometimes short-circuit my questions about whether to have ice cream or not and I just enjoy it! So too I am learning to stop the calculations and equations about earning God’s grace and instead rest in the assurance, the blessed feeling of acceptance, that comes with putting aside the questions and instead believing in what I say. I am loved by God no matter what, and I don’t have to earn that love. I can chose to relax and accept it, enjoying the feeling of refreshment and joy that comes along with it. Amen!

“There is nothing better for mortals than to eat and drink, and find enjoyment in their toil. This also, I saw, is from the hand of God; for apart from him who can eat or who can have enjoyment?” Ecclesiastes 2:24-25.

e-cards and greeting cards

After listening to “All Tech Considered” on NPR today I thought I’d re-post this essay from my former blog. Are you sending Christmas or holiday e-cards or paper cards? It doesn’t matter, it’s the thought that counts! – Anne
I haven’t been a big fan of e-cards. I think it might have something to do with the ease with which they can be sent. This tells you something about my family’s Puritan roots and our adherence to a strong work ethic. (Translation: if it takes hard work, it has value.) My aversion to e-cards also may be related to the fact that they come into my e-mail inbox which I often feel is overflowing already. One more e-mail, I sometimes think, is not what I need!

Today, however, as I started to think about sending Valentine’s Day cards, I thought of how greeting cards might have seemed when they were created. Prior to greeting cards, people sent letters or notes, and they had to come up with the words all by themselves. Greeting cards added pictures, and that probably was a welcome addition. They also added words. What a revolutionary idea! All you had to do was add your name! But I’ll bet that not everyone thought greeting cards were such a hot idea—so impersonal, you know? Someone else wrote the words. All you had to do was buy one, sign it, and send it. And so it goes. New ideas gain traction—slowly at first. Maybe greeting cards were for birthdays first, then cards were added for sympathy, thank-you’s, anniversaries, and weddings. Now you can buy a greeting card for almost any occasion or day of the week. And now I can see how an e-card is no less a message of love than a greeting card that arrives in the mailbox at my house. It has been selected just for me and sent because someone was thinking of me and wanted me to know. Not only that, but e-cards are free! My ancestors would be proud.

Lord, thank you for prayer, which is the epitome of fast, free, loving communication. Amen.

Prayers for people, pets and property

As Hurricane Sandy churns its way north through the Atlantic Ocean heading toward the New Jersey coast, I am in a hotel in Indiana getting ready to participate in an assessment conference. Some people may prefer to be in the middle of a hurricane than in workshops about assessing student learning, but I am looking forward to the professional development.

Keeping my mind on assessing student learning will mean that I have to put aside my fears and worries about how my loved ones will weather the impending storm, how much water will be in my basement, and when I actually will get a flight home. So I turn to God and admit my fears, which is a scary thing to do because it allows me to truly feel the impact of those fears and it reminds me of how helpless I am to control what will happen with the hurricane. I know that it will happen and that it will be big, but I know that God will be with us all during and after the storm, and that God is much bigger than Sandy.

I will let go of my fears for now and hold on to the promise of the rainbow. And when my fears return, as they undoubtably will, I will turn again to prayer and the assuracne that God is with us always.

God of power and love, keep my family and friends safe, watch over our pets and all your creatures, and keeps our homes, schools and businesses safe as well. Amen.

Inspired by Love

Inspiring essays about living life with faith